My Cool Friend Tom

For some guys I know, it’s been Springsteen. For others it’s the Beatles, or Buffet, or Van Halen, or Zeppelin, or the Stones, or the Who.

Since 1981, it’s been Tom Petty for me.

I had heard “Breakdown,” “American Girl,” “Refugee,” and “Don’t Do Me Like That” plenty on the radio and thought they were good.  But then I heard “A Woman in Love (it’s not me)” and thought this guy really knows a thing or two about being me: a slap-hitting, weak-armed 17-year-old now former ballplayer who was hoping sometime before he left high school he would have an actual date with an actual girl. Then I read how Tom had fought his record company to keep the price of his “Hard Promises” album $7.98 instead of raising it to $8.98 and it was off to Record Bar at the Southglenn Mall in my 1964 Buick Skylark to pick up a copy.

For some reason I still cannot explain, the songs on the record just clicked, each one, and after listening to it probably 20 times in two days, I felt like I had made a cool new friend. I used some of my hard earned summer job money to go buy Tom’s first two records. My mom bought me “Damn the Torpedoes” to cheer me up the day I had my wisdom teeth removed so I now proudly held his entire catalog.

Starting with Tom’s fifth studio record, “Long After Dark,” it has been a tradition to pick up his new record on release day, which has continued all the way through “Hypnotic Eye,” his last album in 2016.

The first time I saw Tom live was on the “Long After Dark” tour in spring of 1983 at the CU Events Center. I stood the whole show (to the chagrin of the people around me) and knew all the words to every song. Later that summer, the tour blew back through Denver and Tom played Red Rocks. Of all the shows I have seen there, it is still my favorite – my cool friend Tom at the top of his game.

Since then, I lost count how many times I saw Tom. Tucson Arena, McNichols Sports Arena, Fiddler’s Green, Red Rocks, Pepsi Center – each show was awesome and I always knew all the words. I did not go see Tom when he came through Red Rocks this summer for the Heartbreakers' 40-year celebration tour – it felt like a farewell I was not prepared for, so I stayed home that night and listened to “Hard Promises." Twice. I love those songs as much as ever.

As the years flew by and life always changed, Tom writing great songs and putting out records I loved was a constant. If you want to ask a question impossible for me to answer, ask me what my favorite Tom Petty song is. Not sure I could whittle it down to a top 10.  Some great thrills I have enjoyed later in life as an immature adult have been playing a few Tom Petty songs with my garage band in front of people.

Even though Tom passed too young (WTF, Keith Richards is still alive, but Tom’s heart gave out?), one of my band mates reminded me he had a helluva run. He has brought me countless hours of joy and I will miss him dearly.

Thanks for it all, my cool friend, I dig rockin’ around with you.

Dear NFL, let's just be friends

Dear NFL,

There’s no easy way to say this, so I’ll just say it – I’m breaking up with you. We have been through so much together that you will always have a special place in my heart and I really hope we can stay friends.

This is really hard for me as you have been such a huge part of my life for the last 45 years. Once I was old enough for the game to hold my attention that was it, I was in love. I remember in 1970 sitting down with my Dad for the first time and watching the Broncos. They had this “D” on their helmets with a wild horse bursting from it - I thought it was the coolest thing I’d ever seen. This guy wearing No. 44 – Floyd Little – was by far the best player so he was immediately my favorite. I soon devoted an entire wall in my room to Floyd posters and news clippings with the centerpiece being an autographed photo my dad snagged through the Broncos QB Club.

We grew up together, you and I. You with your growing TV coverage and me at Mile High Stadium. From Floyd to Charley Johnson, to Red, Craig, Haven and the Orange Crush, to Elwood and the comebacks, the Drive, the Helicopter and Super Bowls 32 and 33, to Grease, to Jake the Snake, to the inexplicable Tebow wins to Peyton really wearing a Bronco uniform to Von and the Super Bowl 50 win, it has been an incredible ride.

Even though I lived for it all game after game, week after week, season after season, it’s time to give it up. The pacing around the room and mumbling from being nervous on third and eight. The hunkering down in the basement on a beautiful late summer night to research who might be a sleeper to pick in late rounds of the fantasy draft. The poring over an injury report for a completely meaningless game between Tennessee and Jacksonville in late November to help decide who to pick in the weekly pool. The thinking over my morning cereal how we can scheme to stop Brady and Gronkowski. Now that I’m on the wrong side of 50, I just need it all to stop.

Ellen at I at the final of SB50

Standing in Levi’s Stadium with my daughter Ellen as the clock hit zero for Super Bowl 50 and seeing the confetti cannons go off and the scoreboard flash “Champions” was a feeling I will never forget. As I stood watching my guys put on the Champion hats and dance together, a flood of 45 years of joy, angst, exhilaration, depression and pride and all the other emotions from our relationship overwhelmed me. I knew it was over. I cried.

It also pains me to say, but if I stay in this relationship, it’s like I’m endorsing the violence. I have loved for you for so long, that it has been easy to turn a blind eye to how doctors discovered my friend Keli McGregor had CTE, or how Craig Morton now wakes up every morning, if he can actually sleep, feeling like his neck is on fire, or how Jim McMahon, who in his prime was one of the coolest, most vibrant personalities in sports, can’t remember his name most days.

I don’t spite or judge anybody who loves you. You are America’s game, after all, and I know how intoxicating being in love with you can be. To steal George Costanza’s cliché, “It’s not you, it’s me.” And the main reason I hope we stay friends is that I know I will not be able to help myself from watching Bronco games. We will keep our season tickets and the girls' love for you will replace mine. But the fantasy leagues, the pick ‘em pools, the talk shows, the pregame and postgame shows, the message boards – it’s over. It’s a big world beyond your sidelines and it’s time for something new. Maybe to study for my private pilot’s license, or at last learn the major and minor pentatonic scales, or take on the list of home projects I have put off for years.

So thanks for everything and I really do wish you well. I hope that like me, you look back on our relationship and remember nothing but the good times. We’ll always have Santa Clara!

Tark the Shark and El Deano

Tark the Shark and El Deano

The last week the basketball world lost two titans with the passing of Dean Smith and Jerry Tarkanian. Both had incredible success on the court, sent fistfuls of players from college to the NBA and were larger-than-life personalities. What I am most struck from losing these two legends is the overall reaction.

Not that “Tark the Shark” ever treated people badly, but it is doubtful many would cast him as a paragon of virtue. His passing brought to mind the chewing on the towel, the “Running Rebs” glory days of UNLV, and winning with rosters constructed of colorful characters wherever he was coaching.

Contrast that to the emotion over the passing of Smith, who former Nuggets Coach Doug Moe liked to call “El Deano.” His teaching “The Carolina Way” at the University of North Carolina touched all corners of the basketball world in a positive way and has been a model for business, too. The outpouring of love and respect for him from former players, assistant coaches and competitors was striking.

I do not write this post to slam Coach Tarkanian, but why do you think the reactions to the passing of these two great coaches were so different?

The word you heard over and over when people recalled Coach Smith was “cared.” Sure, he was a brilliant coach and recruiter and won 879 games, but he genuinely cared for his players inside and outside of basketball, both during their UNC careers and and after. One of the great things he used to do was contact his former players on their birthdays. The Carolina guys I came to know went mental over that.

I was lucky to be immersed in the basketball world in the late 80’s and early 90’s thanks to my friend Bill Young who hired me in the Denver Nuggets’ media relations office back in 1987. The connection between UNC and the Nuggets runs pretty deep - you can read a great post about that at Denverstiffs.com. The way former coaches and players talked about Coach Smith was always completely reverential.

My first up-close look at “The Carolina Way” was back in the 80s when McNichols Arena hosted an early season 4-team college tournament featuring UNC and I helped host the press facilities. Coach Moe insisted that UNC have full use of the Nuggets' locker room and facilities. When UNC showed up, I remember Doug being there and the admiration he showed Coach Smith was not what the public would expect from Doug, one of the great wits in NBA history. No jokes or wisecracks; you could tell it was just pure respect and love. Coach Smith also greeted a nobody like me with a warm handshake and smile. It was a very cool moment.

So I hope you will share in my takeaways from the past week:

How you treat people matters – they will always remember. Care for people because of what you can do for them, not what they can do for you. Loyalty matters. Kindness matters. You can compete fiercely and achieve excellence with integrity as a hallmark.

Thanks, El Deano, your example is one we could all better follow.

Reviews:
Theory of Everything: Intriguing story about the life of Stephen Hawking. Stunning acting from Eddie Redmayne and Felicity Jones makes great impact. I’m a sucker for a love story, which is the heart of this movie. This was an intelligent, thoughtful movie I would heartily recommend.

On the flipside there’s “Kingsman.” As my wife pointed out, beware of the February release. This one showed great promise and the trailer looked fun, but what a disaster. The first 45 minutes were decent, but then it just fell into an abyss of terrible violence, language and absurdity. Stay far, far away from this one.

Whose time is it, anyway?

Time management continues to be one of those dragons that we are all constantly battling yet never able to tame. The battle has made a lot of money for some of the people who have great ideas on how to fight it. As I am constantly trying to better manage “my” time, a great question from my Monsignor last Sunday hit me like a two-by-four to the forehead:

Whose time it is, anyway?

None of us chose when we were born (If we could, it would be a tough call - do I choose 1918 so I could grow up and fly Corsairs or Mustangs in WWII? Nah, I’d probably choose 1963 so I could grow up and meet Jill). And as one of my dear friends who has lost more than his share of loved ones says about death, “You don’t get to chose when and you don’t get to chose how.”

So is “our time” really ours?

I choose to believe there is a higher power that decided when I would be born and that I do not have much say in when my time will end. I am good with that. The assisted suicide legislation going through the Colorado legislature is troubling because it is transferring a divine process to human beings. And no matter the argument, us humans are flawed. Pardon the pun, but I hope this legislation dies a quick death.

I have compassion for those who are suffering and looking for a way to end the pain for themselves and their families. However, taking control of that is removing the possibility of a miracle. I understand in a lot of cases a miracle is nearly impossible, and the pain can be unthinkable, but should not we at least give God the opportunity for a miracle and have faith that He knows what He is doing?

My mother suffered with cancer for years. It robbed her of her treasured hair, her weight, her breathing and just about every other physical function. It was very hard on her and my father to fight it every day. There was anger, frustration and bitterness, but never once was there talk, consideration or desire to step in and find a way to end her life with some man-made means. There was always another treatment to try or drug to take - not to artificially extend her life, but because there was faith that even if the chance was one in a hundred trillion, the Lord was certainly capable of making lightning strike as a miracle. In the end, lightning did not strike and Mom was at peace that her fight was finally over as she gasped her last breaths.

Every day, every hour, every minute is a gift to be treasured. “Our time” is not a give from the government, so let us hope our elected officials do not treat it that way.

Recommendation: "American Sniper"

This is an incredibly powerful film that is well made. As jarring as "Saving Private Ryan" for the emotions it stirs. The battle scenes are edge-of-your-seat tense. There are not overt politics in the movie, it was more of an illustration of what our combat servicemen face and what they have to deal with as survivors psychologically when they return. Brilliant acting from Bradley Cooper and Sienna Miller. 

Right Here In Denver

The day after one of the tougher Bronco losses may be a strange time to write about what a great sports town Denver is, but I am lucky enough to know two small organizations headquartered in the Denver that, despite their relative anonymity, have a remarkably huge impact on the world of sports that is worth bragging about.

The first company is Icon Venue Group, which just celebrated its 10^th year anniversary. Icon Venue Group was founded by Tim Romani, who oversaw the development and construction of the Pepsi Center as the President of Ascent Arena Company, and who oversaw the development and construction of Sports Authority Field as Executive Director of the Denver Metropolitan Football Stadium District. Tim also has overseen the successful development and construction of the new Comiskey Park in Chicago before moving to Denver in 1995.

Sports venues bring with them a distinct set of issues most construction projects do not encounter, such as the costs, financing and high public profile. After the successful completion of Sports Authority Field (Invesco Field when it opened), Tim realized there was a niche for expertise in construction management of sports venues that he was qualified to fill after overseeing three projects that catered to each of four major sports leagues – the NBA, NHL, NFL and Major League Baseball.

Wherever in the world an important sports venue has opened in the last decade chances are Icon Venue Group, with its talented roster of experts that is a true “all star” team in the industry, had a hand in its completion. From the O2 arena in England to the Sprint Center in Kansas City to the Staples Center in Los Angeles to Dick’s Sporting Goods Park in Commerce City to the to the renovation of Wrigley Field in Chicago, Icon Venue Group is a true force in the sports business. And it all happens from a 9^th floor office in the Denver Tech Center.

The second company is Bortz Media & Sports Group and Managing Director Arthur Steiker. The next time you look at an NBA or NHL schedule and wonder how on earth it all comes together, think of Arthur, who is the brains behind them.

Arthur starts the process by working closely with both the NBA and NHL offices to determine available arena dates, travel logistics and network TV priorities for all of the teams. Through a series of complicated matrixes and custom computer code, Arthur creates the schedules pretty much single handedly. In the case of the NHL, Arthur also has to account for a team’s “rest” factor to level the ice, so a team that has played three games in four nights does not have to play a team that has played one game in three nights. The factors he has to juggle and take into account for the schedules are staggering and create a web that seems impossible to untangle. For more than 20 years, from his humble office in the Denver, Arthur meets the challenge.

On top of the NBA and NHL, Arthur has also completed schedules for many major NCAA conferences. He also handles scheduling officials for the NBA. Locally, he donates his time to schedule thousands of games for the Gold Crown Foundation, using his wizardry on a complex doubleheader format that he says is as difficult as any schedule he tackles.

A quick disclaimer is that while neither of these stellar organizations are Wolfpack clients and this post was completely unsolicited, I am friends with both. Both Tim and his team and Arthur have made me a better professional and a better person through my relationships with them. So as depressed as I find myself after my beloved Broncos dropped out of the NFL tournament, I do take solace that no matter what happens on the field, court or rink, Denver remains a great and important sports town thanks to the good people at Icon Venue Group and Bortz Media & Sports Group.

Recommendations:

If you missed it, read an interesting profile of John Elway in Sports Illustrated that speaks about his extreme competitiveness, which explains a lot about why he made the coaching change: http://www.si.com/nfl/2015/01/07/john-elway-denver-broncos

Grateful in 2015

For all the goals, aspirations and resolutions that I hold for 2015, the key to any success will be gratitude, my theme for the New Year.

As I have grown older, I have become more spiritual and devoted to living in a way that will hopefully make God proud. That means living with more gratitude. If I can be more grateful for the daily blessings in this life, it will help me be kinder, more present, more patient, and more courageous. This will have to be a conscious decision I make and action I take every day.

Deciding to appreciate the young smiling face that serves me at the restaurant. Deciding to appreciate the incredible view of the Rocky Mountains through a ninth story window. Deciding to take five minutes at the end of the day to remember all the positive things that happened. Deciding to pray and give thanks before every meal. 

More gratitude will start at home. My hot wife Jill is the greatest of gifts and brings as much light as the sun to my world. I will let her know more that I am so grateful for her. I appreciate what wonderful young women my daughters Ellen and Molly have become. They make the world better. I will let them know more.

The passing of the great Stuart Scott, at the young age of just 49, is another cold slap in the face to remind us all that we do not chose when and when do not chose how our lives will end, even if you are bright star adored by millions. Scott’s passing is also a reminder to not put off tomorrow what you can do today, so that gives me even more urgency to be grateful every opportunity.  (You can check out a nice tribute to Stuart Scott: http://espn.go.com/espn/story/_/id/12118296/stuart-scott-espn-anchor-dies-age-49)

To say I knew Scott would be inaccurate. I met him at a few NBA functions back in the day and spoke with him on the phone a handful of times. I cannot remember any specific conversations or any memorable interactions other than he was a nice, personal, vibrant guy. Scott and I were similar in age, and he also had two daughters, which more than anything else makes his death jarring. SportsCenter in heaven just became a lot more interesting.

Recommendations:

Books: Love Does by Bob Goff

My friend Matt Guarino recommended this one to me and it was my favorite read of 2014. The premise is to show love in everything you do and to keep an element of whimsy and wonder in life. Goff does a wonderful job of telling engaging and stories that inspired me want to go out and “do” like he and his family.

Film: The Imitation Game

This story of tortured genius Alan Turing is well-crafted and well acted. Benedict Cumberbatch gives a tour de force and Kiera Knightly is lovely and believable. Rory Kinnear as the English investigator who uncovers Turing’s secrets does a great job of capturing the sadness of Turing’s fate. As a World War II nut, I was anxious to learn more about the breaking of the German Enigma machine, and the human element of this story was fascinating.