Tark the Shark and El Deano

Tark the Shark and El Deano

The last week the basketball world lost two titans with the passing of Dean Smith and Jerry Tarkanian. Both had incredible success on the court, sent fistfuls of players from college to the NBA and were larger-than-life personalities. What I am most struck from losing these two legends is the overall reaction.

Not that “Tark the Shark” ever treated people badly, but it is doubtful many would cast him as a paragon of virtue. His passing brought to mind the chewing on the towel, the “Running Rebs” glory days of UNLV, and winning with rosters constructed of colorful characters wherever he was coaching.

Contrast that to the emotion over the passing of Smith, who former Nuggets Coach Doug Moe liked to call “El Deano.” His teaching “The Carolina Way” at the University of North Carolina touched all corners of the basketball world in a positive way and has been a model for business, too. The outpouring of love and respect for him from former players, assistant coaches and competitors was striking.

I do not write this post to slam Coach Tarkanian, but why do you think the reactions to the passing of these two great coaches were so different?

The word you heard over and over when people recalled Coach Smith was “cared.” Sure, he was a brilliant coach and recruiter and won 879 games, but he genuinely cared for his players inside and outside of basketball, both during their UNC careers and and after. One of the great things he used to do was contact his former players on their birthdays. The Carolina guys I came to know went mental over that.

I was lucky to be immersed in the basketball world in the late 80’s and early 90’s thanks to my friend Bill Young who hired me in the Denver Nuggets’ media relations office back in 1987. The connection between UNC and the Nuggets runs pretty deep - you can read a great post about that at Denverstiffs.com. The way former coaches and players talked about Coach Smith was always completely reverential.

My first up-close look at “The Carolina Way” was back in the 80s when McNichols Arena hosted an early season 4-team college tournament featuring UNC and I helped host the press facilities. Coach Moe insisted that UNC have full use of the Nuggets' locker room and facilities. When UNC showed up, I remember Doug being there and the admiration he showed Coach Smith was not what the public would expect from Doug, one of the great wits in NBA history. No jokes or wisecracks; you could tell it was just pure respect and love. Coach Smith also greeted a nobody like me with a warm handshake and smile. It was a very cool moment.

So I hope you will share in my takeaways from the past week:

How you treat people matters – they will always remember. Care for people because of what you can do for them, not what they can do for you. Loyalty matters. Kindness matters. You can compete fiercely and achieve excellence with integrity as a hallmark.

Thanks, El Deano, your example is one we could all better follow.

Reviews:
Theory of Everything: Intriguing story about the life of Stephen Hawking. Stunning acting from Eddie Redmayne and Felicity Jones makes great impact. I’m a sucker for a love story, which is the heart of this movie. This was an intelligent, thoughtful movie I would heartily recommend.

On the flipside there’s “Kingsman.” As my wife pointed out, beware of the February release. This one showed great promise and the trailer looked fun, but what a disaster. The first 45 minutes were decent, but then it just fell into an abyss of terrible violence, language and absurdity. Stay far, far away from this one.

Whose time is it, anyway?

Time management continues to be one of those dragons that we are all constantly battling yet never able to tame. The battle has made a lot of money for some of the people who have great ideas on how to fight it. As I am constantly trying to better manage “my” time, a great question from my Monsignor last Sunday hit me like a two-by-four to the forehead:

Whose time it is, anyway?

None of us chose when we were born (If we could, it would be a tough call - do I choose 1918 so I could grow up and fly Corsairs or Mustangs in WWII? Nah, I’d probably choose 1963 so I could grow up and meet Jill). And as one of my dear friends who has lost more than his share of loved ones says about death, “You don’t get to chose when and you don’t get to chose how.”

So is “our time” really ours?

I choose to believe there is a higher power that decided when I would be born and that I do not have much say in when my time will end. I am good with that. The assisted suicide legislation going through the Colorado legislature is troubling because it is transferring a divine process to human beings. And no matter the argument, us humans are flawed. Pardon the pun, but I hope this legislation dies a quick death.

I have compassion for those who are suffering and looking for a way to end the pain for themselves and their families. However, taking control of that is removing the possibility of a miracle. I understand in a lot of cases a miracle is nearly impossible, and the pain can be unthinkable, but should not we at least give God the opportunity for a miracle and have faith that He knows what He is doing?

My mother suffered with cancer for years. It robbed her of her treasured hair, her weight, her breathing and just about every other physical function. It was very hard on her and my father to fight it every day. There was anger, frustration and bitterness, but never once was there talk, consideration or desire to step in and find a way to end her life with some man-made means. There was always another treatment to try or drug to take - not to artificially extend her life, but because there was faith that even if the chance was one in a hundred trillion, the Lord was certainly capable of making lightning strike as a miracle. In the end, lightning did not strike and Mom was at peace that her fight was finally over as she gasped her last breaths.

Every day, every hour, every minute is a gift to be treasured. “Our time” is not a give from the government, so let us hope our elected officials do not treat it that way.

Recommendation: "American Sniper"

This is an incredibly powerful film that is well made. As jarring as "Saving Private Ryan" for the emotions it stirs. The battle scenes are edge-of-your-seat tense. There are not overt politics in the movie, it was more of an illustration of what our combat servicemen face and what they have to deal with as survivors psychologically when they return. Brilliant acting from Bradley Cooper and Sienna Miller.